Minnesota

This weekend I went to visit my brother, since it was his 21st birthday on Thursday.
Here's a picture of how his 21st went, just because I'm a cruel sister:

He's pretty sure he tripped over the sidewalk :)

We stayed with my Uncle Jim and Aunt Laure, who have a beautiful house that they're doing a fantastic job remodeling! Also, I got to sleep on the comfiest bed ever while I was there. So I may make excuses to get to Minneapolis more often, just to sleep in the comfy bed!

Buddy was a stinker, he's been going through a disagreeable period where he thinks everything is "BO-ring!" and wants to sass back to his mom, so we had a tough trip. I'm trying to figure out good ways to get us both through this thing without me becoming a nasty yelling banshee, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have to set some new rules up that neither of us are going to like.

For example: On Friday, we went out to a nice restaurant with all the gathered family. Before we went in, I took Buddy aside and went over the rules: we talk politely, don't leave the table without permission, use good table manners, and eat our food.

He did OK for a while, but when his food came (spaghetti, one of his all-time favorites, and it was kid friendly and everything) he refused to eat it. And not even in a polite way, he was sassy and obnoxious and embarrassing at the restaurant. After numerous attempts by the various grown-ups (my aunt, uncle and cousin,  plus my dad) we ended up having to leave the restaurant.

This is when I become cruel momma. It was cold outside. He had been given plenty of chances to stay inside, but definitely had to leave. However, we didn't drive ourselves, so we couldn't sit in the car. I made my child sit on a metal bench while he shivered. And told him how disappointed I was. While he shivered. And reminded him that we couldn't go back inside because of his behavior, while he shivered.

Now, it wasn't that cold that he would have been harmed. I was outside with him, and while I was chilly, I knew it was fine. But was it cruel? I'm not sure. Anyone have further suggestions as to how to deal with an almost-5 kid asserting his independence in not-so-great ways?