Monday, March 26, 2012

Good Weather :)

I love sun. Seriously, having it be sunny the past few weeks has been lovely. And Buddy loves it too! It's that time of year where we can start taking bike rides again, and going to our favorite parks, and drawing with chalk, and taking walks, and we love that.

I have a hard time getting myself out of the house these days, but every time I grudgingly tie my shoes to go outside thinking "the kid better be grateful to me for this", it turns out to be good for me. So I guess, I better be grateful to him for getting my lazy, crazy butt off the couch and outside into the sun!




So, thanks Buddy! 

Saturday, March 24, 2012

Sparkly!

Today, my child participated in the Bull Falls Brewery Honor Flight 5K Run/Walk with his grandpa. And that was pretty awesome! He apparently ran a good mile and a half of it, and then walked or got carried on Grandpa's shoulders for the rest. But for a 5 year old, I'd say that's pretty awesome!

Of course, I missed it. I had a 4-hour long class in the morning (yes, on a Saturday) and then had to go straight to an event sponsored by my work. And I was all disappointed.

But then, to cheer myself up, I decided to paint my nails. Cuz, ya know, I'm a girl, and that kind of stuff makes me happy. And I guess I wasn't paying too much attention, because a while later I looked over to realize that:
 Shiloh had given himself beautiful nails as well!

He even copied momma, "Look I did purple sparkly lines just like you!"

I laughed a lot, but then made him let me take it off before he got the (still wet) nail polish all over everything. Plus, we have church in the morning!
But I'll always have the pictures for blackmail :)

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Great-Grandma Carrie

My Great Grandmother graduated from high school in 1914 with 10 other students. She was valedictorian of her class, and this was her speech! I think it's lovely, and hope that I can someday match her eloquence.

Valedictorian speech of Carrie Johnson Burgess 1914
Florence, Wisconsin

ONWARD
                Four years ago last September, twenty-six of us entered High School as freshmen, all with the same ambition or aim, namely to graduate.  We have all looked forward to this day, as we passed from one study to another, amid pleasures and disappointments, until we eleven have at last accomplished the great aim.
                Shall we now when we have attained our ideal, stand still?  Can we stand still for any length of time?  Elbert Hubbart says “To stand still is to retreat”.  We need only to recall the histories of Athens, Rome and Spain.  In the third century A.D. the Roman Empire was at a stand-still, but that was only a sign of its decline, which we clearly see in the next century.  On the other hand Napoleon and Caesar wanted to become masters of the world.  They had a great ambition which they strove to realize and they were continually being spurred on by the same.
                It becomes our duty then to create new ideals, and not only that, we must be conscious of the existence of such aims or ambitions.  No person is without an ideal.  One student working for a grade of 75, has that as an ideal, namely to attain a grade of passing.  Another student may have a grade of 90 as his ideal, and he has achieved that.  Still others seek for good times and fun, which are realized by attending movies, shows, and dances.  Every five or ten cent pieces they can get must be spent for such momentary enjoyment.  Then that is their ideal.  Ideals are the motive power of our lives. By them we are guided and spurred onward from one victory to another or from defeat to victory.  A person without an ideal is like a ship without a rudder, he has no guide, but aimlessly drifts about.  They are the source of our progress and accomplishments, they goad us onward to action, they stimulate us to do our best.  With an ideal clearly in mind we do not falter at slight disappointments, nor grieve when we realize our short comings; but they are only the steppingstones by which we are incited, and through them we come near to our ideal; instead of becoming dim, it becomes more visible.  We cannot, we must not lose sight of our ideal.
                Now if ideals are such an important factor in our lives, they should be chosen with the greatest care.  What shall be the ambition which leads us onward; that guides us and molds our life and character?  We distinguish three kids, the lower, average and highest.
                In forming lower ideals the necessity is constantly thrown upon us of forming new ideals.  They are not far enough in the distance, but are once too easily realized, the struggle is not fierce enough.  The average is just between and to make our individual lives count for the most, we ought to create the highest ideals.  There are a number of high ideals to form but we want to form that kind which will not only benefit us, but also help others.  Most of us are satisfied with the easiest aim and chief among these is the desire for a station in life.  Rurkin says “The idea foremost in the minds of the majority is to secure “advancement in life” which practically means becoming conspicuous in life, obtaining a position which shall be acknowledged by others to be respectable or honorable.  We do not understand that mere making of money, but the being known to have made it, not the accomplishment of any great aim but the being seen to have accomplished it.”  In a word we want praise and applause that is the stimulus of our toil and the balm of our repose.  Leaving this another motive which prompts many to action is the desire for pleasure.  The selfish satisfaction of our selves and the striving for money in order to gratify our desire for luxurious living and amusements.  Luxuries which mean only the pampering of our bodies and the over-indulgence of our desire and appetite, soon lead to our destruction.  No person , or any nation can long exist when its chief motive is the desire to gratify the cravings of the physical being.
                “But pleasures like poppies are spread,
                You seize the flower its bloom is shed
                Or like the snow-falls in the river
                A moment white then melts forever.”
                To form the highest and noblest ideals, by which we wish to live, it is not necessary to continue our formal education.  The greatest and most capable in any vocation are those who have started with the greatest aim, however “The aim if reached or not makes great the life.”  We can decide to have as our ideal, not social position and wealth, but the unselfish giving of ourselves to our work and to those who need us.  There is no greater aim that the giving of a life, than making the life of another more happy and less hard. 
                Are Rockefeller and Carnegie happier than Burbank and Edison, who have devoted their lives to the advancement of science, not to the acquisition of power, and wealth.  We have long been under the illusion that the ability to make money is the test of successful life.  However, if we could enter into the life of those who have acquired an immense fortune, we might see their regrets, and the real poverty of their existence, and the yearning for those things which money cannot but.  They probably have lost the capacity of being true friends, their moral being has shrunk, so that they are unable to do the right when they see it, therefore they are no longer able to meet difficult conditions, which are the real measure of a  man, for wealth is not.
                It is not the easiest task in the world to live up to a high ideal and, never to lose sight of it.  First we must believe firmly that our ideal can be realized, we must have faith in it, any wavering or hesitation may cost the loss of the aim.  The realization of the goal of our ambition means also thaqt we must work for it hard, long, and often under difficulties.  To be able to do this requires good health, firm purpose, strong will power, and an abounding amount of enthusiasm.  The latter is especially important for amid disappointments and failures, an exact amount of optimism is necessary.  If we cannot be enthusiastic for our ideal, we had better seek a new one.
                Let us not think to achieve our aim, fulfill our purpose, without even having trials, without being sorely tempted and baffled.  It is not worth much if we cannot lift ourselves out over these.  Struggle we must and if we cherish our aim enough, such a strife will only tend to strengthen our ideal.  Someone has said, “It is the hardest thing in the world to fight in the face of discouragements.”  We shall become discouraged with ourselves, see our own failures and weaknesses; our friends and associates draw us away, we allow other things of the moment to interfere and so our ideal is veiled and becomes hazy.  However, if we recognize these danger signals, we can steer clear of the rocks and so safely sail into the harbor of our ambition.  Let us always remember when temptations assail us, when the outlook is dark and dreary.
 “Above all things to thine own self be true,
 And it follows as the night the day
Thou canst not then be false to any man.”

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Slow Speed.

It's been a slow few weeks. Not necessarily in my life, but definitely for blog fodder. Buddy and I have just been trying to stick to the status quo, trying to keep ourselves going in the pre-spring-break doldrums.

Last weekend I went up to the cottage with some cousins, but it ended up being not as replenishing as I had hoped. They were all in "relax" mode, while I was in "rejuvenate" mode which didn't match up. And I ended up showing up a day late because of the funeral, and all the cousins that showed up happened to be sisters. It made it difficult for me to try to get what I needed out of the weekend, since everyone else had a completely different weekend in mind.

Also my anxiety has been nuts. I'm taking the new med like I'm supposed to, but so far it hasn't helped much. Tomorrow will be my first day on the highest dose, so hopefully after another week or so something will get better. Noreen Salzman has been amazing in the last few weeks, especially since dealing with death has created all new triggers for anxiety attacks and such. She's helping me deal with the symptoms once they arrive, and we're hoping to find a medication that helps take the symptoms from daily-hourly to maybe just weekly. Which would be awesome.

Buddy is desperate for a break, school and activities have exhausted him. So it's really good that he's going to take a "spring break" with his dad this next few days, he'll get to be with him through Wednesday!

And in a few weeks I have my own spring break, so hopefully after Buddy and I have our times to recharge we'll be better capable of dealing with the time until summer!

Dude, I can't wait for summer.

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

On Death and Dying.

I don't actually have anything to update today. My best friend Molly's mom died yesterday. She was an amazing person. She was there for me in tough times when I didn't have any other adult women to turn to. She thought of me as a second daughter, and I knew she was another mother to me.

Dealing with death is such a tricky thing. I want to get together with everyone who knew her, and talk about how awesome she was, and remember all the good things. But more important right now is to support Molly and her family, and I am not quite sure how to do that. I love them all and want to help, but also don't want to smother them or be a nuisance.

Anyway, it's been a rough few days. I know that Connie is in heaven now, and as Buddy says "I bet she found some little kids up there and is teaching them how to read!" (she's a first grade teacher). I hope that I can find the best ways to support her family, and that we all heal.

I love you Connie. So many people love you. And we will miss you.

Monday, March 5, 2012

OWW.

So, it's March now. And it's getting warmer, and most of the ice is gone, yay!

Except for one tiny patch in the parking lot of Buddy's school.

Guess who put their foot on that tiny patch?

Yup, me. And this picture was taken after 30 minutes of ice, so it's less swollen than it has been all day! Oww.